A soft landing for this guy.... Not for Evo !
With Epiphany behind us and family returning to the far
reaches of the galaxy it was high time to set about the business of returning
to fitness. A forecasted cool dry
morning afforded the perfect rain-free commute opportunity. A predicted low of 36 meant I would have to
dress warm but wouldn’t need to worry about ice.
I got up and checked the outside thermometer and sure enough,
36 degrees. I dressed and set off at my
usual 5:30 commute departure time. It
doesn’t get any darker in January than it is at 5:30 AM. With my headlamp spewing its lumens out in
front of me I began my journey.
As I was climbing the first short hill (224th)
my headlamp picked up some diamonds on the road (ice crystals). I moved to the
side and rode on the gravel park strip to avoid slipping. This wasn’t what I was expecting and I
figured it would be an anomaly. My brain isn’t at full speed at 5:40 AM.
On the next climb my rear wheel again started to get
squirrely and I unclipped and my foot slipped and hit the deck. Nothing big, I
collected myself and walked up the hill pushing my bike on the sidewalk. At the top I checked the road surface, remounted
and rode a couple more miles.
Then on the next steep hill just past five corners my
rear wheel spun and I s-l-o-w-l-y unclipped and again walked up the short,
steep hill. True to form at the top the
road was dry and I clipped in and resumed my journey to the Northeast.
I was ever vigilant for the next several miles and the
hills, both up and down, were flatter and all was fine. There was only one downhill looming ahead and
buoyed by a few safe miles I was hoping for the best.
As I crested the top and peered down I was barely rolling
I was so nervous about the downhill. I
started down and rode my brakes. I could sense it was getting slippery. “Be smart” I thought to myself. I unclipped
and before I could put my left foot down my wheels flew out from under me and I
crashed down on my left side going about one mile an hour.
The fist-sized battery for my headlamp was in my left
rear jersey pocket and the fall forced it into my side. I felt like I had been
punched in the kidney by Mike Tyson. My
left elbow hurt as well. I got up and
started sliding my feet in a slow shuffling motion toward the sidewalk. I tried to lean on my bike like a walker but
the wheels slipped out sideways so I just tried to get myself and my bike to
the sidewalk.
Yeah, I know how you feel man.....
Once off the road I tried to take an inventory of
myself. My head was okay although my
helmet and beanie were a bit askew from the fall. My kidney area hurt a ton and I took a deep
breath to check for broken ribs. Hmmm….
Maybe yes, maybe no; oh well. My left
elbow was sore but not as bad as the kidneys. My arm had full range of
motion. I thought about calling Hottie
to come get me but I didn’t want her driving on these icy roads.
Once at the bottom of the hill I remounted and resumed my
ride to work. With a calm voice I cursed
out loud. This was starting to not be fun.
The rest of the ride to work was free of ice and I spent most of the
time trying to determine if I was going into shock or just feeling crappy.
My falls, combined with walking up and down the icy hills
and subsequent slow riding resulted in my arrival to work about thirty minutes
later than usual. I grabbed my work
clothes and headed for the showers. By
now my elbow was really hurting and I wondered if it might be cut.
I passed a bathroom and stepped in and went in front of
the mirror to check my elbow. The elbow
of the jersey had a wet spot about two inches in diameter but because my jersey
was maroon in color it didn’t really look bloody. I knew it couldn’t be anything else but
because it was essentially transparent it didn’t sink in. Yes, my powers of
denial remain in full force even in crisis. I am incredible aren’t I?
Once in the locker room I pulled off my jersey and my
black base layer. Both had holes in the
elbow surrounded by wet spots. Their
color and my old man eyes meant I couldn’t ascertain how much blood there
was. In the shower I washed off my elbow
and it burned. The soap lathered up
pink. This wasn’t looking good.
After my shower I couldn’t get the elbow to stop bleeding
but in a masterful stroke of happenstance my shirt for the day was also
maroon. Before putting on the shirt I
checked my elbow in the mirror of the shower room and with my old man eyes I
couldn’t quite tell how bad it was. With
a finger I pulled on the skin and the blood really began to flow. I finally
stuffed a paper towel inside the arm of the shirt and made my way to my
desk. I muttered under my breath.
“Another Red Letter day at the Baileys.”
Oh GROSS !!
I am NOT going to show you a gross picture of my cut or anyone else's
Say "Thanks Evo!"
The slower ride hadn’t generated much body heat and I was
focused on getting a cup of hot coffee before pursuing first aid. Once I had coffee in hand I chased down some
bandages and antibiotic ointment. Following
a remote consult, I returned to my desk and did my best to be productive.
I felt a lot better riding home that evening and after my
shower Hottie applied some butterfly bandages to hold the wound shut and
enclosed my elbow in some bandages she had procured earlier in the day. Thanks for taking care of me.
What would January
be without a black ice crash? I hope to
find out someday.
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