Training in February looks like this...
By pure
coincidence it is almost two years exactly since I uttered these wise words to my Granddaughter Sophie. At that time
she was frustrated by a series of falls on her first day on cross country
skis. When she commented that it was
hard my parental instinct was to say that it wasn’t but that would have been a
lie. Instead, in a rare show of wisdom I
agreed and then had a moment of brilliance.
“Yes this is
hard…………. All the cool things are hard! And you’re doing a really good job at this
hard thing!” She later told my daughter
that skiing was her favorite part of the trip and that she was good at it.
I do believe
that self-esteem comes from completing hard things. I’m no longer in search of
self-esteem but I do find that many of my favorite things are hard.
Competitive
cycling is hard. The training is hard;
the racing is hard, just finding the time to ride can be hard. To be strong in
the glorious days of summer you have to ride in the miserable dark days of winter.
Inevitably the odds catch up to you and sooner or later you crash. You get
cold, you get wet. You get sick, you have self-doubt. You get beat. Your
equipment wears out and breaks. You
catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror as a middle aged man in a skin tight
lycra idiot suit and comprehend, now and then, the true extent of your folly.
Yet somewhere in
your head you somehow know that there is an eventual payoff. You find nobility, perhaps even a form of sanctity
in the suffering. You come to respect those who “get it” and willingly pay the
price. You fee`l a kinship with those
who are fast and find an even stronger bond with those who pay their dues
without regard to the dividends of their suffering. Contrary to your wisdom and insight you begin
to place a value on the suffering itself.
This convoluted
tapestry of emotions and logic must be maintained at a safe distance from your
rational mind. When you encounter a
like-minded individual or group you bond almost with a sense of relief. The validation allows you a measure of comfort
in your skin. Misery loves company.
None of us is as dumb as all of us...
It is within
this world where our feelings contradict wisdom that the geniuses at Rapha find
the opportunity to exploit our insecurity. It isn’t that we need their clothing
to go fast or far or that spending money reassures us. It is that they have
communicated to us that they understand the inexplicable position of our
thoughts where we respect and even enjoy the suffering of cycling.
Their clothing
is exceptional but it is the mystique of the band on your arm that says, “I get
it. Do you?” As if to prove that every rule has
exceptions there are more than a few posers and buffoons that can be seen brandishing
the arm band. Typically these pretenders
are easily spotted and just as easily dismissed.
In framing our
training as a battle against the elements Rapha has succeeded in getting us to
classify their clothing as equipment, perhaps even armor to shield us from the weather.
It used to
disappoint me that when I rode in team kit that other riders in team kit would
wave at me but when I wore non-team kit they would not wave back. I sensed that they assumed they were better
than me. Perhaps, and maybe I am being
generous here, they valued the kinship of finding fellowship with other racers
who, “get it.” In reality you can
generally discern the serious riders from the casual weekenders.
Poser !!
Sadly in our smugness
we dismiss those whom we consciously or unconsciously deem to be somehow
inferior to us but they are still fighting their own battles. I remember
watching high school cross country races and seeing the occasional obese runner
in last place and realizing it is harder (emotionally) to finish in last place
than it is to win. I admired the courage
they showed then and now.
We all have hard
things to do and I hope I am able to help those around me in their battles and
I appreciate the help I get with mine.
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